Glass Pineapple vs. the Patio Headache: One Year

A year ago I was in my back yard digging a big shallow hole that I was going to fill in with bricks to make a patio. I had a persistent headache, but I was used to headaches, and it didn’t feel like a migraine so it couldn’t scare me. The headache kept getting worse, and whenever I leaned over a little bit it would stab me, and I kept having to stop and go inside and sit down and drink ice water, and then I’d feel a little better and go back out and try again. I’ll give in to a migraine if I have to, but not some pesky junior headache.

But I finally had to stop and go in and lay down with a cold pack on my head. The next day I still had the headache. And the next. A week later I still had it and went to my doctor, who ordered a blood test and then told me it was due to hypothyroidism. A few months later I still had the headache and she decided that even though I always have fairly low blood pressure, I should take blood pressure pills and that would cure me. It didn’t. Then she decided it was a variation of my usual migraines and I had a week of the evil Topamax. A few months after that I got a sinus infection and now she thinks that my sinuses are causing my Constant Stabbing Headache, which is still there in my left temple, only not as constant as before.

And the big hole has remained in my back yard, a big ugly reminder of the battle between my headache and myself. My husband knew I was looking forward to that project, and that if he just did it himself it would make me mad, and maybe he also knew that I would feel like I had given up permanently if I let anyone else do it.

But I had to admit, finally, that I was probably never going to finish digging this hole. So my husband finished digging it for me, and then this weekend I felt better than usual so I started trying to figure out how to fill it in with bricks, and realized it is a gigantic project. I’ve made paths before, but I guess because they’re narrow they were not very complicated. Yesterday I spent all day putting down bricks, taking them back out, realizing the many flaws in my design, getting mad, crying, throwing bricks. . .it wasn’t pretty. But it was good exercise. By the end of the day I ached all over and had accomplished nothing in the physical manifestation of my patio, however I think I have conquered it mentally and maybe I’ll even be able to finish it next weekend, headache willing.

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