Denial

That pain on the left side of my head must be a migraine today, because I can’t think of any words when I want them. I titled this post “denial” because I was thinking “what’s that thing where you don’t let yourself do or have or eat something…?” and “you deny yourself” is as far as my brain would let me get. But “denial” is so commonly used nowadays in the phrase “in denial” that it sounded wrong. So then I went to the thesaurus and found abstinence, austerity, renunciation, avoidance, self-restraint, self-discipline, “swearing off”. As in, “I have migraines so I’m swearing off most food and activities and any exposure to light, odor and sound because they’re probably migraine triggers.”

And what brought this up was I started wondering if this morning’s left-side pain was the Constant Stabbing Headache resurfacing or a migraine starting up, and I thought I would try some aspirin and tea to see if that would help, but as I was opening the tea box I heard myself think “I hate to waste a tea bag if it’s not a migraine.”

What??!! I hate to waste a tea bag??? That’s the way I talk when I’m thinking about taking naratriptan, since it’s expensive, my insurance company limits it and I just don’t think it’s very good for me. Am I so far gone into the migraine hell of “don’t” that I seriously can’t drink a cup of tea without worrying? Why do I even get up in the morning? (Oh, wait, it’s because if I sleep in I get a migraine.)

Anyway, from reading the thesaurus I think the word I was originally looking for was “abnegation,” which I think is a pretty hilarious-looking word and not a good title for a blog post either.

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Explore posts in the same categories: abnegation, caffeine, headaches, migraine

2 Comments on “Denial”

  1. deborah Says:

    interesting enough; waste:forlorn, bleak, wild, solitary, dissipate, abandoned, spend, bare, consume. Oh, what we do to just hold onto our little goods a little while longer. And when we need them the most. I do the same thing!

  2. glass pineapple Says:

    Now, since reading this comment, when I get out a tea bag I think “desolation” (even though it’s not one of the words in the list) and see a kind of desert scene in my head. I like the desert, so that’s a good thing.


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